Author Archives: Theloonius

With the ousting of Pam Bondi (not for lack of loyalty) a new salivating cocksucker takes the reins of the Department of Justice – Todd Blache. Dedicated to kneeling subservience and cheerful personal delivery of germ-free Diet Pepsis…

Why represent the American people when you can stand up for the One, the Only, the source of Light and Truth, our American Messiah, Donald John Trump. Kevin McCarthy Lindsey Graham Ted Cruz Mike Johnson

These real American heroes are influential in getting other “real American men” erect as they phonesturbate on their attention-exploiting Apps all day. Nick Fuentes Chris Rufo Matt Walsh Tucker Jordan Peterson

In 2019, during the first Trump administration, Ken Cuccinelli, whom Trump appointed as acting director of U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, revised a line from the poem in support of the administration’s “public charge rule“, which would have rejected would-be immigrants who lacked adequate income and education to support themselves. Cuccinelli would have rewritten the caveat as, “GiveContinue reading “Trump Liberty”

What happened to REAL American masculinity? You know, hanging out with the guys, eating some grilled meat, talking trash, being a bit offensive & rude, a few genuinely funny sex and race-based jokes….just men being men….drinking….uh, some Diet Pepsis. When you wanna cry about the libtards, find a “safe space” for you and your muscleContinue reading “Real Men Drink Diet Pepsi”

This is the chant we shout loudly on repeat like a broken record when someone expresses disapproval for our savior, the modern messiah, Donald J. Trump. There are some Americans who refuse to express loyalty and insert His divine penis into their mouths. We call them Traitors!! We will show our patriotism by nodding atContinue reading “USA! USA! USA!”

Cocksucker of the Day award goes to Brian Glenn, from cable TV channel Real America’s Voice, who showed up at the White House press pool on Friday to ask Volodymy Zelensky “Why dont you wear a suit?” and “Just want to see if you own a suit?”….among other important questions. Brian Glenn got on hisContinue reading “March 2025 Cocksucker”

The time is coming – for the faithful, the believers, the loyal ones – to UNITE under the banner of our Lord and Savior, Donald J. Trump or maybe, just maybe, if the forces of Satan prevent his election in 2024, then we shall little for the loud young Indian guy Vivek.

With the help of my Uncle Steve’s Captain Crunch secret decoder ring, the biblical identities of the following persons are now revealed for the Whole World to see! Robert Mueller = Pontius Pilate Mitt Romney = Judas Iscariot Mike Pence = John the Baptist Joe Biden = Emperor Tiberius Caesar Tucker Carlson = the angelContinue reading “Donald Trump, American Christ”